Here is part 2 of your guide to eating dinner with other adults. For the first part, please click these words.
Obstacle 2: Conversation
The truly passable among us probably practise their conversations before they have them. This avoids awkward silences and strange, under pressure outbursts of madness. A few topics of conversation off the table in any given situation; UTIs, where you can buy acid strong enough to dissolve bones, loving UKIP, pubic hair topiary, racism (unless to condemn it) and Nicholas Cage films.
Here are a few things you can talk about,
Continue reading “How to: Eat Dinner With Other Adults (Part 2)”
The hope is that by your early 20’s the spoon/aeroplane method has taken full effect and you are now aware how to put food into your mouth, chew and swallow.
What we are not taught is how to go to Sainsburys regularly enough to make sure there is food in the house when you are hungover and unable to venture out into
the cold, blinding light of the day time. For this I totally blame the aeroplane method, I often look in my fridge, realise there is nothing there and leave it expecting something tasty to zoom through the sky and parachute into my kitchen and/or mouth.
Continue reading “How to: Eat Dinner With Other Adults (Part 1)”
There are 3 obvious signs of a high functioning, successful adult who has a confident grip on their own life. It is like a triangle of impressiveness, and if you have managed it, or even scraped by with 2 of them then you don’t need this blog and should probably just get out my face.
Most people talk about the big 3 of adulthood being marriage, kids and a mortgage, but I know plenty of people with these things that are 1. Not actually ready for those things and 2. Still very passably adult. The 3 signs are actually seemingly a lot more achievable, but also at the same time a far distant hope that some of us may never master. This blog shows you how to do the bare minimum and stay alive.
Continue reading “An Apple A Day Won’t Keep You Off Web MD”